6/30: Nothing Compares to This

The Worst Day of My Life
{If you missed the beginning of the 30 Day Challenge you can find it here}

On a random day in September, in the year 2006, I was out with a friend at a park in Warrenton, VA.  My parents had taken away my cell phone (for reasons I do not remember) so there was no way to get a hold of me.  It was a nice cool autumn day, and the sun was shining brightly that afternoon.  My friend and I had been walking the trails, sitting by the water, and were just having fun talking.  Then, he got a random phone call from my mom asking him to bring me home.  I was confused.  I had felt like something was wrong all day but had been pushing that feeling aside because I thought I was being silly.  Now, that feeling came back with a vengeance and I was starting to feel uneasy.

As we made our way back to his car I still couldn't shake that feeling that something bad had happened.  I knew that if something was wrong that my dad would've called, so it was weird that Mom was the one who had.  Then, it hit me:  Dad died.  I told my friend and he looked at me with concern.  Why would I say something like that?  That is a horrible thought!  But I knew.  My heart had been dreading something all day and I knew that was what it was.  Before I had left the house that day I had a feeling like I should've stayed.  I knew that I should've listened to that feeling.

The drive home was a blur.  I had a feeling of what I was going home to but nothing could've prepared me for what I actually saw as we drove up.  There was an ambulance in the driveway and a lot of cars as well.  There were people moving around in the backyard but I couldn't see what they were doing.  I think I was in a daze at that point.  As I walked up to the front door, my Aunt Barbs met me at the walkway and told me that Dad had died.  And when I got to the door Mom and Sam fell into me, crying hysterically onto my shoulders.  At that point, I knew I had to be strong for them.

There were a lot of people that came by the next few days to pay their respects.  I don't remember a lot of it.  I knew that people were concerned I was in shock, because I was laughing and carrying on like nothing had changed.  I still thought Dad was going to walk through the front door.  Denial was my way of "coping" and I just laughed it off when people tried to talk to me about it.

I will never forget how I felt on September 29, 2006.  It was the worst and hardest day of my life.  I am a different person because of it, forever changed.  I anxiously await the day I will be reunited with him in the Kingdom of Heaven.  

Love you Dad.