2/30: Fears, What Fears?

Being Brave is Overrated

{If you missed the beginning of the 30 Day Challenge you can find it  here}

I really had to think about this question.  Everyone has fears but I think you really have to soul search to figure out which ones are legitimate and which ones are superficial.  I think that is the most difficult part because I think every fear is one hundred percent legit, but there are some that are way more important than others.  

1.  Spiders.  Ugh...I hate spiders!  Tarantulas and wolf spiders are the worst too.  I'm so afraid of getting bit by one.  I remember this one tv show, In A Heartbeat, where EMT's got a call to go to a house where someone's cactus had burst open and tarantulas had been living inside of it.  The person who was home at the time had been bit over a hundred times and they had to rush them to the hospital.  When the front door was closed, you saw all of the spiders on the back of it.  I can't even think of it without getting chills up and down my spine.  

On a side note, I don't know if something like that can really happen but I am not about to look it up to find out.  Also, does anyone else remember that show?

2.  Being in a car accident or a plane crash.  I think I just have a fear of being hurt honestly.  Right after high school I had a friend who died in a car accident.  She was driving home really late one night and got into a fatal accident on a back road with another car.  I remember a few of us going to look at her car after it happened, and it was a mess.  I also had another friend who got in an accident with a tractor trailer and her mom was thrown from the car and died instantly.  My friend survived.  

There are just so many crazy people who don't pay attention when they're driving and I don't want to be near them when they lose control.  

When it comes to planes, I just think there are freak accidents every day.  At that point it's not in your hands and I (personally) have no control over what happens.         

3.   Loss of a loved one.  I think everyone has this fear because it is very real.  When I was younger I went to a psychiatrist because I had a horrible fear that my dad would be away on business and die.  I don't really remember this fear because I was so young, but my mom has told me numerous times about it so that is how I know I had this fear.  

When my dad died in 2006, it was hard to wrap my mind around never being able to see him again (on this earth).  When you go through a big loss like that, it makes you realize how fast life can change on you.  Your whole life becomes different and you are not the same person you were before it happened.  After a loss like that, you realize that this could happen to another loved one just like before.  It makes you a little more guarded and cautious about every relationship in your life because you don't want to hurt like that ever again. 

My biggest fear is to lose Chris and go through what my mom went through when we lost my dad.  I saw the pain she was in and I never want to experience that.  I pray every day that God will bless us with a long and happy marriage and that I will die first (when I'm like....90).  ha!  :-)

If I were to be completely honest, I'd say that I really have two more fears: (4) I'd go into anaphylactic shock due to my nut allergy and (5) having Chris lose his job.  I have to realize that all of these are out of my control and I just have to have faith.