The wedding party is such an important part of any wedding. The people that are selected are those the bride and groom feel closest to and those people should mean the most to them. If you're having a normal wedding in your hometown, it's easy to choose who you want because 99% of the time, all the people you ask can make it. It's much harder to choose when planning a destination wedding because the venue may have a low number of seats available, or it could be too expensive for a lot of people to come.
Chris and I found that our biggest problem was the number of people Disney allowed us to bring along with the package we purchased. The limit was 20 (including the bride and groom) so we had to make sure we had plenty of room for our family before we started picking people for the wedding party.
The big thing other brides should consider when choosing their girls is whether or not they'll take the supportive or controlling role. If you've had a friend that was married and turned out to be bridezilla you may want to think twice about asking her to be in yours. Chances are, girls that are extremely controlling will also want to control a lot of the aspects of your own wedding. Always choose people that are going to build you up on your wedding day, not tear you down.
Another thing you'll want to remember is that you do not have to choose someone just because you were in their wedding. Never ever choose someone out of obligation. Even if you made a pact with a girlfriend at a young age that you would be in each others wedding, it doesn't mean that if you grew apart over the years that you still have to ask them! Always choose people that mean the most to you and your groom! Those are the people that you will cherish for years to come.
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Destination Weddings (part 1): Invites
Today I want to write a post on planning a destination wedding. Chris and I got engaged on August 20th, 2001 and are getting married on April 20th, 2012 (four months exactly from today!!), so I've had a few months to start getting things done.
The first thing we had to decide is where we wanted to get married. The decision was easy for Chris and I because not only do we love Disney World, but we also got engaged there and immediately knew we wanted to celebrate our wedding there as well. The reason we chose Florida was because my family lives in Virginia and Chris's family is in California. We didn't want our families to feel as though we were choosing one side over the other if we got married in either state, so we settled for something in-between. Chris and I also knew that in choosing an in-between state, we would upset a lot of people because not everyone would be able to come due to cost and we are also limited in the number of people we could bring with the Disney package we wanted. We quickly realized you can't please everyone.
With our Disney wedding package, the guest list can include no more than twenty people (including the bride and groom). We knew that picking and choosing who we wanted to celebrate with us would be extremely hard, but were ready for the challenge. We quickly decided which family members would be invited and then decided we'd use the remaining number of seats for friends. The hard part was that people were upset we said only husbands and fiance's were invited due to the limited seating at the event. I quickly realized that picking and choosing was going to be a much more difficult process than I had originally thought. Chris and I really had to start picking our battles when it came our family and friends because the stress just wasn't worth it. You always hope that people understand it's your wedding and won't be upset and cause you stress, but with Chris and I that was not the case.
I think the one thing Chris and I figured out along the way is that no matter what you do and how hard you try to accommodate everyone, there is always going to be someone that is unhappy. I know that it's much different dealing with a destination wedding than a hometown one because everyone wants to celebrate with you and for a lot of people who have to travel, it's just not possible. The one thing I constantly tell myself, (because I hate hurting other people's feelings), is that this is something Chris and I really want and are so excited for! Would we like more people to be able to come? Of course! But this wedding is literally a dream come true and I wouldn't trade having it at Disney for anything. We're happy and that is the most important thing. :-)
If there was any advice I could give to brides planning a destination wedding, they would be:
The first thing we had to decide is where we wanted to get married. The decision was easy for Chris and I because not only do we love Disney World, but we also got engaged there and immediately knew we wanted to celebrate our wedding there as well. The reason we chose Florida was because my family lives in Virginia and Chris's family is in California. We didn't want our families to feel as though we were choosing one side over the other if we got married in either state, so we settled for something in-between. Chris and I also knew that in choosing an in-between state, we would upset a lot of people because not everyone would be able to come due to cost and we are also limited in the number of people we could bring with the Disney package we wanted. We quickly realized you can't please everyone.
With our Disney wedding package, the guest list can include no more than twenty people (including the bride and groom). We knew that picking and choosing who we wanted to celebrate with us would be extremely hard, but were ready for the challenge. We quickly decided which family members would be invited and then decided we'd use the remaining number of seats for friends. The hard part was that people were upset we said only husbands and fiance's were invited due to the limited seating at the event. I quickly realized that picking and choosing was going to be a much more difficult process than I had originally thought. Chris and I really had to start picking our battles when it came our family and friends because the stress just wasn't worth it. You always hope that people understand it's your wedding and won't be upset and cause you stress, but with Chris and I that was not the case.
I think the one thing Chris and I figured out along the way is that no matter what you do and how hard you try to accommodate everyone, there is always going to be someone that is unhappy. I know that it's much different dealing with a destination wedding than a hometown one because everyone wants to celebrate with you and for a lot of people who have to travel, it's just not possible. The one thing I constantly tell myself, (because I hate hurting other people's feelings), is that this is something Chris and I really want and are so excited for! Would we like more people to be able to come? Of course! But this wedding is literally a dream come true and I wouldn't trade having it at Disney for anything. We're happy and that is the most important thing. :-)
If there was any advice I could give to brides planning a destination wedding, they would be:
- Even though you and your fiance have probably saved for a while for your destination wedding, a lot of other people probably have not. Take that into consideration when deciding on who to invite.
- Some places (like Disney) have a limit on how many people can be at the ceremony. Be aware who counts and who doesn't (for example: for Disney kids under the age of two don't count) and also make sure you know birthdays in case a child ages up before you get married.
- Make lots of lists! I've utilized Microsoft Access and Excel a lot throughout this process and found them very useful when needing to refer back to certain things.
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Grace and Mercy
Today I am thankful. And a little fearful. I always say a little bit of fear is good...but this time I have the fear of God in me.
Today I was almost in an accident. And not in a small fender bender, but an accident where I could've been seriously injured. I'm not sure what happened. I honestly don't know. One second everything was fine and the next traffic was at a dead stop. Luckily I was able to swerve into the empty lane beside me and narrowly miss the truck in front of me. As I swerved I saw some moron parked, not broken down, in my previous lane shutting his door and walking down the side of the road to help the person that was broken down on the side of the road!!!
I have never been more scared in my entire life. God gives us life and he can just as easily take it away. Obviously HE is not done with me yet and it really makes me wonder what God has in store for me. It also makes me wonder...are we ever truly lucky? I don't think so. I think that God always provides and always has a plan. HIS plan for me was to live and spread HIS word. God wanted me to be okay and I am. Is that luck? No. I think it is a mixture of mercy and grace.
Today I was almost in an accident. And not in a small fender bender, but an accident where I could've been seriously injured. I'm not sure what happened. I honestly don't know. One second everything was fine and the next traffic was at a dead stop. Luckily I was able to swerve into the empty lane beside me and narrowly miss the truck in front of me. As I swerved I saw some moron parked, not broken down, in my previous lane shutting his door and walking down the side of the road to help the person that was broken down on the side of the road!!!
I have never been more scared in my entire life. God gives us life and he can just as easily take it away. Obviously HE is not done with me yet and it really makes me wonder what God has in store for me. It also makes me wonder...are we ever truly lucky? I don't think so. I think that God always provides and always has a plan. HIS plan for me was to live and spread HIS word. God wanted me to be okay and I am. Is that luck? No. I think it is a mixture of mercy and grace.
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